There’s a difference between you and me;
A difference so subtle only the wise may see.
When you say I love you, while it may be so;
Conditional love is temporary in nature – a gift that can only be borrowed.
Blinded to the distorted illusion that broken hearts create;
While promises of the broken soul become lies leaving the hopeful sedate.
I know that I confused you, I know I gave you hell.
For I sparked fear inside of you and I watched you repel.
For but a few short moments I experienced being in love,
But for the most part I loved you just as you were; choosing to ignore the things you fell short of.
I understand the pain you felt for I was never clear;
When I said I loved you, I let you hear what you wanted to hear.
You thought you were perfect, that you could do no wrong;
What I actually meant was, I see you in your brokenness and I want to tag along.
I wanted you to know that there was no need to hide.
Yet, as it turns out, hearing your I love you resulted in a very different ride.
When I say I love you, I mean every word.
Free of conditions and broken visions. Leaving the moments ungoverned and the lines unblurred.
Because I only loved you, I failed to fall apart;
For I was not blinded to the selfish basis of your heart.
A time will come where I will choose to give my heart again;
Know that there will be little difference between you and him, except for his own ability to love without refrain.
For I am not broken and I have nothing to hide,
So from this point on I will make choices that reflect my inside.
May you find clarity on love and its versions,
For no-one will fall in-love with you because of your loves perversions.
There is a difference between loving a person and being in-love.
I wish that I had more to say on the topic, but all I know is it is near impossible to be in-love with a person who treats you badly. You might choose to stay in the situation because you love them (or for other unidentified reasons) but ask the question, am I in-love with this person?
As people we often learn the hard way and on a personal level that has left me broken and questioning almost everything I am.
I now realise.. I need not be different, I need to see different.
Experience has taught me to open my eyes to the people around me; to continue not to judge but learn to not to ignore.
Don’t change who you are based on a decision that you have made. If a person has learned to treat you badly or take you for granted, it is upto you to teach them how you want to be treated. No-one else.
They aren’t going to wake up to themselves unless there is change – they have no reason to.
Keep moving forward, focus on you and trust that the people who are meant to fall away will do so.
From one healing heart to another.
JX
Jollyoddbod 